Sher-ruff of Venice

By Calvin

New Self Arrest Ordinance

An amendment of the private persons arrest law 68.007.1069: any known human being within the city limits of L.A. County, State of California can act to arrest oneself for violation of the U.S. Constitution, California Constitution, all the treaties ratified by Congress and all other laws that protect the well-being of the person.

While prowling the streets of Venice Beach one rain-soaked winter’s night. Officers Boozefling and Spinner decide to shakedown a man sleeping on the sidewalk at 8:59:57 PM. – three seconds before the Jones Settlement takes effect at 9 pm every night.The person they decide to pounce upon is the well known Peace and Justice personality David FuzzyHead. Officer Boozefling yells out, “we’re going to arrest you for sleeping on the sidewalk.” Spinner screams, “stand up and spread”um hands against the wall.”

Fuzzyhead and a man on the sidewalk start singing, (Just like the old IWW.) the underground hit arrest yourself.

Sung to the R&B classic

arrest yourself   na na na
arrest yourselves   na na na
If you can’t arrest yourself
Then no one else will give a hoooot
So arrest yourself   na na na

Boozefling orders the two to stop singing that subversive song or she is going to send them down to the 77th division and lock them up. Fuzzyhead knowing the law of the land ,sites the brand new self arrest ordinance.at 9:03 PM Officer Spinner says to Officer Boozefling your violating ordinace 68.007.1969. Boozefling takes her handcuffs out and hands them to officer Spinner.Put these on Officer Spinner and not to tight I am placing myself under arrest for violating Mr. Fuzzyheads human rights.Officer Spinner says she is an accomplice to the crime and places herself under arrest.The two Officers ask Mr. Fuzzyhead if he has a current drivers license. Could he please drive them both down to the 77th police division so they could be booked in and charged with the violation.

arrest yourself na na na
arrest yourselves na na na


Categories: Feature